26 Years Old

I always visualize that how cool it is to be an adult. How cool it is to be like 25 or 26 I can go wherever I want, I can dress whatever I want, I can have the luxury to buy things that I want with my own money and I can manage my time too.

I can go to the mall so weekdays and don't have to care about school or homework or being chased by the security because i was in the mall during school hours.

I can just skip the day and eating ice cream at 12:00 p.m. 

Seeing all those young adults with their cool blazer and bag drinking coffee with clients, shopping with their bestfriend, eating sushi for breakfast or dinner and looking so busy yet cool focusing on their laptop on a busy cafe.

In my head it was really cool and I couldn't look forward to be a young adult. But I also forgot that today I am not the 15 years old me.

I don't have any math homework tomorrow or a pop test from my geographic teacher. 

I already have a job.

I already do my yearly taxes.

And I have more responsibility.

I forgot that I am now already 26 years old.

But it's just not the 26 years old young adult that I picture I would be.

Regretful epiphany

Just like every other year I always start my year with a reflection and when i did, i realize something... the words that i often said is that "I regret".

 I regret to stop halfway of the job that I wanted to do,

I regret not getting serious with YouTube,

I regret not going and making that content that I've been planning and saving for 10 years,

 I regret that I'm not spending all much time with my grandfather,

 and I regret that I'm so afraid of what people think that it limits me.

So I decide that in this year I don't want to live my life in much regret. I know that I cannot avoid regret forever but I can also try to not become regretful. 

But I will do what I want to do even tho it's going out of my comfort zone.

If I'm going to do a different career path then so be it,

If I want to learn something new, why wait?

I really I really don't want to waste my time and just be regretful of the things that I couldn't do because of what people said or because of my limiting belief.

Ignoring and stopping my YT channel was one of my biggest regret, but now I want to create and relive my YouTube channel again,

Starting right now.